The Different Forms of Faithfulness

Today I spotted a blue jay outside my window for a brief moment. Had I looked up a moment longer, I’d have missed it. When I looked up the symbolism of the blue jay, I was met with the words clarity, resourcefulness, intelligence, assertiveness, communication skills and faithfulness. Earlier I had done a reading on myself in regards to my relationship and strong themes in the reading was friendship, participation & ally ship. To then see the blue jay a few hours after further confirmed the messages I had received.


For those who don’t know (and those into astrology) I have my natal Saturn (representative of hard work, discipline and authority) in my seventh house (representative of  one-on-one relationships including marriage and business partnerships). In other words, I take one-on-one relationships very seriously. It’s probably why in my short 24 years of living, I’ve had more than three long term relationships. Even some of my “flings” are long-lasting and morph into different kinds of relationships. With this placement, it doesn’t just mean that I take relationships seriously. It also means mastering these one-on-one relationships and partnerships is something I have to really work at. The paradox is that although it isn’t without difficulty at times, this is where I find the most gratification. The growth, understanding and accomplishment of relating and connecting to someone I have a very important relationship fulfills me in a way that nothing else does.

At any rate, the reading paired with the blue jay sighting made me take a hard look at myself and the way that I have been dealing with things in my current relationship. The blue jay is associated with faithfulness because they are known to mate with the same bird often for the duration of their entire lives. Talk about dedication. Not only that, as the very smart and assertive animals they are, they are very vigilant and protective of their mate (which is why they stay alive together I suppose lol) and their young. Now although it’s in my nature to stick with relationships, I recently  have developed a habit of kind of trying to run away when I’m afraid. Almost as if I’m trying to break my own heart before my lover has a chance to. I came to the conclusion earlier this year that when I try to run from him, I’m really just running from myself. And all throughout the second half of this year, its been a recurring theme, me trying to run away and sheepishly turning back around to have to face myself and what the true underlying issue is.

The person I’m involved with isn’t perfect, but when it comes to relating he’s pretty damn close. He’s honest, forthright, always keeps his word and even through the organic shifts in our relationship, he’s remained…well…faithful. Never taking the opportunity to leave, only to grow. Taking the changes in stride and always being loving, understanding and accountable. With my issues of running, today I had to confront the fact that I have not been faithful and unwavering in my commitment to this union, due to my fear and anxiety. Often when faithfulness is mentioned in the realm of romantic relationships, it’s about not straying to other people. That hasn’t been an issue for me. But what about the other parts of faithfulness? What about the constant and resolute decision one makes to always nurture the partnership, even when it triggers fear that helps us grow?

It makes me wonder, where could faithfulness be lacking in other areas of a relationship before it comes to physically stepping out. I binge-watched the Netflix series Medici a few days ago and of course the story line I paid the closest attention to the main character Cosimo and his wife Contessina. I won’t give away anything, but it was quite interesting to watch their respect and understanding of one another that they had obviously worked at developing for years crumble under pressure and eventually have to be rebuilt. Starting (from my point of view) with Contessina making an extremely difficult decision that while brave, protective and intelligent (like the blue jay), undermined the wishes of her husband.


Image courtesy of

It’s one of those things that you have to look at from different perspectives because on the surface, it would seem her actions were well-implemented in protecting her husband and family short term. By the same token, the actions she took also led to a long-term predicament that put them all (and others) further at risk. Had she been faithful and unwavering in her understanding and respect of her husband’s wishes, things may have turned out better for their family long-term. One can only speculate because of course, Contessina’s actions were not the only ones at play. Cosimo had just as much responsibility, if not more given his position. But of course I paid the most attention to her actions because I recognized myself in her. Nevertheless, that falter in faithfulness played a huge part in not only their relationship suffering, but their family and others.

I say all of this to say, when it comes to building and nurturing strong partnerships that help us fulfill our divine purpose, learn, grow & leave legacies (if that’s what you’re setting out to do) not only do we have to prioritize faithfulness in the physical sense, but also being faithful in understanding our partner, being faithful in respect to honoring the union, and faithfully making our decisions out of intuitive love instead of fear.

I hope ya’ll got something out of this.


P.S. Here’s a song to set the mood.